Posted by ryeco


Hey everyone!
My name is Corey Fleming, and I'm new to creative writing as a major, but it's
something that I've always loved and have been using it as a means to express
my emotions for a long time. A lot of what I write tends to be quite dark in nature,
and a lot of everything has end rhyme that is way too obvious. So I did this experiment
to see if I could move away from that. I decided not to worry about rhyming so much
and I like the results. I also took some advice and wrote this right after something awesome
happened, which if you can't tell happened to be conversing with a very interesting girl.


To Sakura, A Beauty to Behold
 
Dancing words within you fall on eager ears,
as easy captivation lies await in a flash of smiling eyes.
If I had lost all but your smile it would yet infect me
with unexplained delight to be invited to its presence.
 

Unbeknownst the wonder grows, in essence blinding,
eyes asphyxiate in beauty, ears and mind follow suit.
There is easy grace in the way you sway;
 

Caught so unawares,
lilting speech romancing mind
so deprived of formal feel…
What hast thou begun?
 

With English as an art you dance within my ear,
calling to an aspect all but set aside.
Such care you take with ever roaming lines,
there is no superficial flow to the effort of your mind.
 

I feel a fool for my ungainly stumblings,
leaning to and fro to the want of your winds.
This is a case of the stomach and the butterflies,
flutter in my thoughts with tickling wings,
carrying an air of lovely disposition.
 

So nice to know that you are here,
like a child finding faeries to be real,
that there is something sweeter in this life to savor.
My palette has become quite ruined with bad taste,
and this cleansing has been coming so long overdue.
 

Such foreign flavor is not to be denied;
hypnotically you hold me, in arms of intrigue,
stronger for the mysteries yet revealed.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, February 29, 2012 at 2/29/2012 12:42:00 AM . You can follow any responses to this entry through the comments feed .

6 comments

Wow, that is an incredible poem. My favorite part was "So nice to know that you are here, like a child finding faeries to be real, that there is something sweeter in this life to savor." It is really powerful. I definitely enjoyed reading it, great job!

February 29, 2012 at 1:39 AM

I loved the poem. I did enjoy reading the poem it touched me. You did a great job.

February 29, 2012 at 5:02 PM
This comment has been removed by the author.
February 29, 2012 at 5:50 PM

You seem to write in a very classic style. Some of the word choice was very sophisticated but was mixed with language that was underwhelming in comparsion. However, I think this is a solid poem that does a great job of expressing emotion in a different light. Great job.

February 29, 2012 at 5:50 PM

Dude, this is a really good poem. I like your choice of words. I also enjoyed how you talked about English in such a way. Well done.

February 29, 2012 at 8:58 PM

This was a pretty brilliant poem. I liked how it doubled as a description of how English or Creative Writing helped you to express yourself, as well as being a description of a girl.

March 1, 2012 at 10:01 AM

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